Y26

They say things grow better with age. As I am with age, I thought I would look into said claim by said ‘they.’ I found this:

http://www.oprah.com/blogs/A-Few-Things-That-Get-Better-with-Age

This made me feel a little better—as Oprah always does—, but I was still slightly uneasy about one fact: I am nowhere to be found on this list. Not even referenced. I started to worry a little bit. As I reviewed the list, I noticed that it does just say a few things that get better with age. And George Clooney is on the list. And people tell me I’m basically George Clooney all the time. Maybe I’m implied. So I calmed my fragile heart and decided to look into it for myself. I found one of those automatic picture aging things on the internet, which are obviously scientifically accurate. Have a look:

Fate is a cruel mistress. But Oprah is a kind and lovely mistress, and she has helped to ease my pain. On her list, she mentioned that sense of self gets better with age. Having spent plenty of time with myself has given me a sense that I exist—1 out of 1 René Descartes agree. This sense of self (among other things), coupled with experience, has engendered wisdom, of sorts. My birthday passed recently, and I have a tradition of writing a birthday post on my blog, which is what you’re reading. Surprise! Don’t leave! These birthday posts consist of summations of major lessons I have learned throughout the last year, mostly due to experiences I have had. I have done it exactly twice:  Y24 Y25. I do it again, right before your very eyes:

Living in the moment

I tend to wax nostalgic. Wax in this case is not a transitive verb. I enjoy people, places, moments, and people in places at moments. Having thus enjoyed these things, it is natural for one to think fondly on them. It is not, however, natural to get stuck therein. In my head lives an analytical mind. I never gave him permission, but there he sits, analyzing. One astute conclusion he has made is that, generally, good times are good. This can be a nostalgic realization, as one is wont to want good times. The past is tried and true; one knows the outcome. The present is trying, it’s true; one never knows the outcome. Here are my thoughts on the matter, much more eloquently and succinctly expressed by one Jeffrey R. Holland:

“The past is to be learned from but not lived in. We look back to claim the embers from glowing experiences but not the ashes. And when we have learned what we need to learn and have brought with us the best that we have experienced, then we look ahead, we remember that faith is always pointed toward the future.”

Things change. Even returning to an exact place/etc can only produce similar results because the circumstance will never be the same—after all, time is a part of circumstance. Time has passed and has taken with it the exact circumstance that produced the results we so loved/cherished. Learn to recognize and appreciate what you have in the very moment you have it, and things for what they really are. Learn to cherish the good about these things and show that appreciation—especially when it comes to people and relationships.

PS:  This doesn’t in any way condone living in a frivolous way—just the opposite in fact. This encourages awareness, thoughtfulness, mindfulness, etc., which are absent in frivolousness by definition.

RebmembeRing

Somewhat the same as ‘living in the moment’ is remembering. Or maybe they’re opposites. Once one learns to recognize a great thing for its great qualities, one has substance worth remembering. Remembering keeps good times alive and vibrant. It keeps hard times from having simply been torture. Remembering helps us be humble and grateful, which leads to a more purpose-laden, fulfilling, and mindful life.

A recent experience drove me to want to keep a journal. It being rather special (the experience), I came across a lot of things that I didn’t want to forget. The knowledge that I would be writing in my journal later caused me to focus more throughout each day. An increased focus and awareness helped me to capture significance and moments that I might have missed otherwise. And now I have those moments, complete with attached emotions and details, vividly recorded forever. Even the intent to remember drove me to live more fully, and this type of living led to experiences that I will be proud to remember. .RebmembeR. Revisit. Renew. Ricola.

Goalfullness

If you’re not progressing, you’re digressing; steady progression is much easier than playing catch up. Live actively, purposefully. This requires being aware of the life one is living and the direction one wants it to head. This requires openly considering what activities will get one there, and whether the activities in which one is currently engaged fit the bill. This requires making plans and making sacrifices. This requires setting and achieving goals.

As wisely stated by Charles A. Didier:  “Goals are the means by which values and dreams are translated into reality. Happiness does not just happen. It has to be earned by thinking, planning, and the constant pursuit of values—both in work and in love—over the course of a lifetime.”

This also requires recognizing and avoiding distractions. There are so many and they’re so available.  It takes a truly conscientious effort to avoid them. A life without goals turns drab and stagnant quite fast.

When you have the ability to help or make a difference, do it

It’s highly unlikely that you’ll ever regret having done so. And you get to make a difference for someone else. And, not that it should be the main motivation, but it’s always nice to:

“Remember that when you help another up a mountain, you are a little nearer the top yourself.” - Thomas S. Monson

And don’t merely accept these opportunities when they are handed to you.  Create your own.

And I like avocados

Here’s to another great year.  I guess at this point, I will just settle for another year.